Chuck Vs The Gravity Boots
by Afficted
Summary: Remember when Chuck accidentally caught Ellie and Awesome in a compromising position? Well, turnabout can be... strange.


**Hi! Since my first story is all angsty, and keeps Chuck and Sarah apart, thought I would provide a one-shot alternative that has them together. This is an AU story, set in Season 2 some time post Jill trilogy. Chuck and Sarah are together. Everything else is the same. **

**Disclaimer 1) I don't own Chuck or any other characters.**

**Disclaimer 2) You will probably figure out that I have no idea how one safely gets in and out of Gravity Boots. I just found out they were called Gravity Boots. Since my entire story hinges on this, you would think that I would have found out. I didn't.**

**Disclaimer 3) Sarah may be a little or a lot OOC. She's hard to write, but this is comedy, anyway. **

**________________________________________________________________________**

Chuck Vs. The Gravity Boots

It was a bit after 9:00 p.m., when Ellie Bartowski arrived home via cab, carrying her leftovers from an excellent dinner. She was feeling a bit smug due to her successful escape. Yes, there was some guilt for abandoning Devon to his fate. But Devon actually _liked_ opera. Well, a little more than she did at any rate. Three hours... of Wagner. She shivered. It hadn't been too hard to feign illness, even from fellow physicians. Devon, of course, knew _exactly_ what she was doing, but he wasn't going to rat her out. He'd just give her crap for it in the morning, which for him, would consist of a raised eyebrow, and saying, "Not awesome, Hon." Then she'd make it up to him and everything would be fine. In the meantime, she'd have a nice evening to herself, maybe enjoy a bubble bath. She was considering her options, as she unlocked the door, walked into her home, looked up, and stopped dead.

Before her, in the front hallway, was Chuck suspended from Devon's gravity boots. She assumed it was Chuck. He was wearing Chuck's shorts and one of Chuck's t-shirts (though gravity had caused the shirt to slip down revealing his tummy).

The reason that she could not be 100% sure it was Chuck was because he also had what appeared to be a woman's underpants completely draped over his face.

Behind the man who was probably Chuck... was Sarah. Sarah wasn't wearing anything at all. Except for a deer in the headlights expression.

Taking this all in, Ellie did what one would do if they were a Bartowski caught in this situation.

She shrieked, dropped her doggy bag (where it spilled over the floor), and exited out the door from which she came, yelling,

"My eyes! My EYES!!!"

________________________________________________________________________

The next day found the three sitting around the breakfast table, plus Devon.

Captain Awesome was alternating between laughing hysterically and cursing the fates that he had missed the fun.

Ellie was looking pointedly at Devon periodically wipe tears from his eyes with a kitchen towel. She could not seem to look at Chuck, who of course, was looking at her, his chin resting on his hand.

Sarah was also there, but had spent the last half-hour with her face firmly ensconced between her arms on the table. She had refused to lift her head up, in spite of both Chuck and Ellie asking her to show herself repeatedly. Whenever they would do this, they would just hear a smothered "Nuh-uh."

Chuck knew quite well that Sarah was in her current state because she so valued Ellie's friendship and opinion of her.

Finally, Awesome tried to break some of the tension.

"K, guys. I realize this is a bit - Well, OK, a _lot_ embarrassing for you, but I think it might do you some good to just get it off your chests. You'll feel a lot of relief that way. Besides, I am _dying_ to hear this story."

Ellie looked at her fiancée. Of course, he would act this way. Devon was open about pretty much everything, and didn't have much sense of boundaries. Hell, she had to remind him at times what he could or could not tell his friends about their sex lives. Even so...

"Honey, there's no need for that. I'm... I'm just glad that Chuck and Sarah are having... fun. I didn't imagine it would be... that... kinky, but-"

Ellie was interrupted by a muffled wail from Sarah.

Chuck threw up his hands and said, "OK, that's it! Ellie, Devon. I assure you that there is a perfectly... logical explanation for what you saw last night. One that doesn't have me and Sarah being..." He cleared his throat. "Freaks."

Ellie and Devon looked at Chuck expectantly. Sarah gave out a "Mmmmhhhh?" from her position. It sounded like a skeptical noise.

Chuck took a deep breath, and began.

"See, the thing is, guys.... I've been... well, I've been wanting to get in better shape for some time, now."

Devon said, "Hey, you should have come to me, Bro! I could have helped you with that! I'd have made you my pet project!"

Chuck laughed weakly, and said, "Um... yeah. I know... I know you would have, and I don't... think I was quite ready for that level of discipline yet. The truth is, I... wanted to go at my own pace, at my own... comfort level. Anyway, with that in mind.... I was home last night, and I saw the gravity boots, and I thought, hey, Devon uses those all the time. That'd be a fun thing to try! Well....."

________________________________________________________________________

_Sarah was just about done gathering her overnight bag when the phone rang. She was definitely looking forward to the evening. Ellie and Devon were out with colleagues for dinner and the opera. She was surprised when Chuck had told her of this; his sister and soon-to-be brother-in-law didn't strike her as opera types. When she asked Chuck about this, he simply shrugged and said, "Doctors", which in his mind seemed to explain it. Meanwhile, Casey was out for the night taking a much needed break. Sarah had assured her partner that Chuck would be safe with her. Casey had simply grunted an affirmative, and was on his way. As a result, she would finally have some alone time with her... boyfriend. Her actual boyfriend. She played it over in her mind, and smiled. Once they had finally gotten together for real, Sarah had started to wonder why on earth she had held out so long. Everything was just perfect with him, whether it was the physical aspects of the relationship, the complete sense of safety and trust, just sitting and talking together. It made her feel slightly sad about time missed due to Fulcrum agents (one in particular), deli owners, ex-partners in the CIA (one in particular), but mostly due to herself. Well, she was determined to make up the time. She adored Chuck's friends and family, and was thrilled that they had accepted her into their lives without hesitation. It was one of the top perks. But right now, it was good to have Chuck only to herself. Her shift at the frozen yogurt shop had gone on later than she had thought it would, and she still needed to get her stuff from the hotel, but Chuck assured her that he would be back at the apartment waiting for her._

_  
Then the phone rang. She saw the picture. It was him. She smiled and flipped open the phone. "Hi!"  
_

_  
From the other end, she heard his panicked voice. "Agh! NO!" Then nothing.  
_

_  
Her stomach clenched, but a second later she was racing to the door, down the stairs, to her car. She was in. She was driving. She was praying under her breath.  
_

_  
Why had she left him alone? Casey had always been there for backup! Sure, it was only going to be a couple of hours with Chuck by himself in the apartment. But what if Fulcrum had been watching, waiting for this opportunity for one of the agents to be gone, and for the other one to slip up, and leave the Asset unprotected? She fought against the thoughts. She couldn't panic now. Chuck's life was depending on it.  
_

_  
She managed to not kill herself or anybody else while speeding to her end location.  
_

_  
She jumped out of the car.  
_

_  
She looked around. No obvious signs of danger from the outside. No residents of the complex seemed to be in the area. This wasn't exactly new. It often seemed like the only people who lived there were the Bartowskis and Casey.  
_

_  
Heart beating fast, Sarah approached the door, and listened. Nothing. She tried the doorknob. It turned. Unlocked.  
_

_  
She opened the door slowly, clenching her teeth, slowly pulling her gun from the small of her back. She crept in the front door, moving as quietly as possible, and then-  
_

_  
"Hi, Sarah."  
_

_  
She nearly jumped out of her skin. She pointed the gun at the source of the sound, and heard a shriek. Wait.  
_

_  
It was his shriek._

_Chuck was hanging upside down from Captain Awesome's gravity boots. One hand was in front of his face, the other was in front of his groin. He was twisting funny. His t-shirt had also fallen down, displaying his abdomen.  
_

_  
"Chuck? Are you all right? I got your phone call! Were you attacked?"  
_

_  
She was still looking around, checking for enemies. As she did this, she noted two things. One, a fallen chair underneath Chuck. Two, his cellular phone open on the floor.  
_

_  
Chuck's voice was solemn. "Yes, Sarah. I was attacked. A squad of enemy agents came in here, and decided to torture me by hooking me up to gravity boots."  
_

_  
Sarah looked at him.  
_

_  
Chuck moaned. "I did this to myself!"  
_

_  
Sarah continued to look at him.  
_

_  
Chuck said, "You know how I've been trying to get in shape for missions, right? Well, I was home waiting for you to get here, and I got bored, and I saw Awesome's gravity boots, and he always made it look so easy, and one thing led to another, and.... And when I got hooked up, the chair that I was putting my hands on fell over, and I couldn't reach it, and when I tried to grab my phone, it slipped out of my hands, and accidentally dialed you! And I tried to reach the ankle straps, and I couldn't do it!"  
_

_  
Sarah looked at him for another few seconds._

_Then she burst out laughing. _

_Chuck pursed his lips before saying, "Thank you. Thank you very much. You can understand why I screamed in horror when I realized the phone had called you."  
_

_  
Sarah could barely catch her breath. "You (gasp).... You're so incredibly - hahahahahaha - You're so adorable, so … CHUCK!" She giggled some more.  
_

_  
It was a bit hard to tell because he was upside down, but Chuck looked stricken. "Thank you VERY much," he growled_

_Sarah walked over to him, still giggling, and said, "But it's true! I mean, LOOK at this, here!" She suddenly grabbed the small flat tire of his tummy and began tickling it. Chuck shrieked again. Sarah fell to the ground, laughing harder. As it so happened, this had her sitting with her face just under Chuck's. As she looked at him, her giggles trailed off, and she said, "Hmmmmmm..."  
_

_  
Chuck was having a hard time reading her expression now. He was wondering when she was going to cut the hysterics and help him get down. "Hmmmmmm, what?"  
_

_  
Sarah started to play with his hair a little. "Y'know, I was just thinking about that movie, 'Spider-Man', you showed me a couple months ago?  
_

_  
Chuck said, "Um. Pardon?"  
_

_  
Sarah continued, "I didn't think it was a very good movie, actually. The narration was silly, and the villain had a dumb costume. But-" She edged her face closer to his, and smiled - "There was one part I liked."  
_

_  
Gently taking Chuck's face into her hands, she leaned in the rest of the way for a nice, slow kiss.  
_

_  
When they came up for air, Chuck said, "I feel... dizzy."  
_

_  
Sarah smiled, "I'm glad I have that effect on you."  
_

_  
Chuck said, "Actually Sarah, I've been feeling dizzy for awhile because of all the blood rushing to my head. Would you help get me down, please?"  
_

_  
Sarah's mouth dropped open. She pushed back away from Chuck, and said out loud, but as if to herself, "The romance is over? Already?"  
_

_  
"Aw, c'mon, Sarah, I consider myself a very romantic guy, and I can continue to be romantic once my feet are actually on the ground!"  
_

_  
Sarah affected a pout. "There was a time when I could excite you no matter what position we were in."  
_

_  
They both paused for a moment to consider that sentence.  
_

_  
"The point is," Sarah continued, "I think we need to prove something to you, and to each other."  
_

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Chuck rolled his eyes, which was actually a very odd sensation when inverted, then said, "And what would that be, Sarah?"  
_

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Sarah briskly pulled the chair and the phone out from under Chuck. "I told you before Chuck... I think you're capable of anything you put your mind to."_

_She removed her jacket, slipping her gun inside it, as she said this. Then she removed her shoes. It was when she began to take off her stockings, that Chuck felt his mouth grow dryer than it already had been.  
_

_  
He croaked, "What... are you doing?"  
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_  
Sarah had finished removing her socks, and threw them on the pile with her jacket, she then stood in front of Chuck and began to slowly unbutton her blouse. "I'm providing motivation, Honey." She smiled. Showing all her teeth.  
_

_  
Chuck looked at her for a moment. Ohhhhh..... boy. With difficulty he pulled his eyes away from her front and looked up at his ankles. He thought, "Keep your eyes on the prize, keep your eyes on the prize. Wait, what's the prize, her or the ankle straps? It doesn't matter, you fool!" Marshalling his strength, he reached! He twisted! He struggled to use his abdominals! He didn't even come close! He slumped down looking back at Sarah. "Sorry," he moaned.  
_

_  
Sarah looked a bit disappointed herself. She said, "I am, too. But, I'll keep helping you."  
She finished the buttons. The top came off.  
_

_  
This continued on for what seemed to Chuck to be ten times longer than the original hour that he had been stuck like this. After more - slow - stripping, and more failed attempts on his part to extricate himself, Chuck fell once more, breathing hard. "I can't... I can't do it, Sarah. I failed. Please get me down."  
_

_  
Then his eyes bulged out as a bra went flying past his face. All Chuck would say for the moment was, "Guuuuuuhhhh...."  
_

_  
Sarah smiled, looking down at herself, then looking at him. She slowly started to move her upper body towards him, closer, tantalizingly closer, then just as contact was about to be made, she pulled back. She said, "You wanna try that, again?"  
_

_  
Chuck groaned. "OK, now that- That is just evil. You're teasing me with.... with those.... those.... evil breasts!"  
_

_  
Sarah raised an eyebrow._

_Chuck continued. "Yeah, that's right. Evil, no wait, not simply evil breasts! FULCRUM breasts! You're trying to ensnare me with FULCRUM breasts! So whaddaya think about that?"  
_

_  
In spite of his light-headedness, Chuck was actually feeling pretty clever about that one.  
_

_  
Until he looked up at Sarah. Her arms were crossed over her chest. She wasn't smiling.  
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Chuck was confused. "Um.... Sarah?"  
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She spat, "I don't have Fulcrum breasts, Chuck."  
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Now he was VERY confused. "Um.... Wait... What?"  
_

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Sarah started pacing around in front of him, and said. "Fulcrum breasts. I do NOT have Fulcrum breasts. But you know who DOES have Fulcrum breasts, Chuck?"  
_

_  
She suddenly whirled so she was facing him again, and jabbed a finger into his chest.  
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_  
"JILL!"  
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Chuck looked at Sarah, wondering if Casey's surveillance was capturing this moment for posterity.  
_

_  
Sarah started up again. "Yeah, you know all about Fulcrum breasts and... and Fulcrum thighs... and Fulcrum ass... and hot Fulcrum-"  
_

_  
Chuck interrupted, "Are we actually HAVING this conversation?"  
_

_  
Sarah snarled, "How do you think it felt for me to have to watch you get it ON with that _woman_?"  
_

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Chuck said, "You watched that?"  
_

_  
She said, "No, I didn't Chuck - Jill put her clothing over the video monitor - but I still knew what was going on!"  
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Chuck couldn't help noticing that while Sarah was saying this, she was removing her skirt.  
_

_  
"Ummmmm..."  
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_  
She continued talking as she shimmied out of her underwear, "Yeah, that's right, so if you're so interested in Fulcrum breasts, Chuck, you'll have to go and find them, because you're not going to be able to look at mine!"_

_And with a devilish grin that was not lost on Chuck, she stretched her panties over his face._

_Chuck thought, "I love Sarah Walker, but she has a very twisted sense of humor."_

_  
Then he heard something.  
_

_  
"Um... Sarah, that sounded like a door."  
_

_  
Sarah whispered, "Oh, CRAP!", and he felt her shift behind his body, her hands plastered to his sides.  
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_  
Then he heard the unmistakable sound of his sister, shrieking and running out the door yelling the appropriate Bartowski credo.  
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_  
Chuck said, "Y'know, Sarah, I don't think we're ever going to have problems convincing her of our romantic cover again."  
_

_  
Sarah just whimpered behind him.  
_

__________________________________________________________________________

Of course, Chuck didn't tell them about the gun or the Fulcrum parts, but everything else was almost accurately relayed, with _one_ other instance of bending the truth.

"The bottom line is I.... asked Sarah to help motivate me to get myself out of the grav boots. And being the understanding, loving girlfriend she is, she was obliging, even if she was a bit weirded out. Though she did pause a bit when I asked her to put the underwear on my face. Sorry 'bout that, Sweetie."

He kissed her head.

Both Devon and Ellie were looking at him differently than they had ever done. "So....", Ellie said.

"So, it's like I said," answered Chuck. _"We're _not freaky perverts. Just me." He smiled strangely. He added, "And, I'll make sure that I'm moved out by the end of the month."

"Oh, come off it, Chuck", scoffed Ellie. "We love you. You're not going anywhere."

That's right, Bro," affirmed Awesome. "Besides, it's not like you're _that_ freaky. Man, some of the stuff that Ellie and I have- Ow!" Ellie had just elbowed him in ribs.

Chuck put his hands up in a stopping gesture. "That's... that's quite all right, Devon. I think we've shared enough." He leaned down to Sarah. "Sweetheart? Honey, it's safe to come out now. We all love you."

Ever so slowly, Sarah raised her head. She looked at the eyes of Devon, Ellie, and her beautiful, wonderful boyfriend. Her anxiety left her. She felt safe.

Then the sound happened.

Devon said, "What the hell is that?"

Ellie walked over to the window. "It sounds like... laughter. Loud... braying laughter. It's coming from John's place. Well, that's nice. He's such a serious guy; I don't think he gets to enjoy life very much."

Chuck froze. He was about to ask Sarah if in the insanity of last night, she had remembered to turn off the surveillance.

When he turned to her, Sarah's head was back in her arms.

Firmly ensconced.

___________________________________________________________________________________________

**So, that's it! Hope you enjoyed the silliness.**

**My wife of more than ten years is my fanfic editor, and I'm very thankful for her patience and understanding for this current bizarre addiction I have.**

**When I initially described this story to her, she got a little confused when I explained the underwear on the head bit. She asked, "You find that… hot?" I explained, "No, I find that funny." She was immediately relieved.**


End file.
